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A Ahad
Four Star Member
Age : 40
Joined : 25 Mar 2008
Posts : 232
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Jim Woods
Three Star Member
Joined : 07 Jun 2008
Posts : 171
|  Subject: Re: Time for a joke  Thu Jul 10, 2008 7:13 am | |
| | Shoot him on a count of three? |
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Shelagh
Admin
Joined : 11 Jan 2008
Posts : 2321
Location : UK
| | Subject: Re: Time for a joke Thu Jul 10, 2008 7:14 am | |
| I don't know; how do you stop a mathematician from pestering you? (If Jim's not right!) 
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Shelagh Watkins
http://shelaghwatkins.co.uk/ |
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lin
Four Star Member
Joined : 20 Mar 2008
Posts : 975
Location : Mexico
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Shelagh
Admin
Joined : 11 Jan 2008
Posts : 2321
Location : UK
| | Subject: Re: Time for a joke Thu Jul 10, 2008 7:30 am | |
| Good one lin! I love this:
| Quote: | Two mathematicians are in a bar. The first one says to the second that the average person knows very little about basic mathematics. The second one disagrees, and claims that most people can cope with a reasonable amount of math.
The first mathematician goes off to the washroom, and in his absence the second calls over the waitress. He tells her that in a few minutes, after his friend has returned, he will call her over and ask her a question. All she has to do is answer "one third x cubed."
She repeats "one thir -- dex cue"?
He repeats "one third x cubed".
She asks, "one thir dex cuebd?"
"Yes, that's right," he says.
So she agrees, and goes off mumbling to herself, "one thir dex cuebd...".
The first guy returns and the second proposes a bet to prove his point, that most people do know something about basic math. He says he will ask the blonde waitress an integral, and the first laughingly agrees. The second man calls over the waitress and asks "what is the integral of x squared?".
The waitress says "one third x cubed" and while walking away, turns back and says over her shoulder "plus a constant!" |
Not such a dumb blonde!
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Shelagh Watkins
http://shelaghwatkins.co.uk/ |
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P. Gordon Kennedy
Four Star Member
Age : 20
Joined : 13 Jan 2008
Posts : 576
Location : Crystal Falls, Michigan
| | Subject: Re: Time for a joke Thu Jul 10, 2008 11:26 am | |
| If a person had a career in spending other people's money, what would be his job?
He'd be a politician, of course!
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Pam
Five Star Member
Age : 43
Joined : 01 Feb 2008
Posts : 1450
Location : Nova Scotia, Canada
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Abe F. March
Five Star Member
Age : 69
Joined : 26 Jan 2008
Posts : 1401
Location : Germany
| | Subject: Re: Time for a joke Thu Jul 10, 2008 9:54 pm | |
| I'm waiting too Pam. Perhaps there is a mathematical forumula in how long we must wait.
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"To Beirut and Back"
http://www.freewebs.com/abemarch
"With every adversity there is a benefit." |
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A Ahad
Four Star Member
Age : 40
Joined : 25 Mar 2008
Posts : 232
| | Subject: Re: Time for a joke Fri Jul 11, 2008 12:55 am | |
| | lin wrote: | | Work him out with a pencil? |
Very close to what I had in mind, Lin. Mathematicians are not easy people to confuse or preoccupy with puzzles, so I figured we'd have to give them something hard. How about this?
"A square has four sides. A pentagon has five sides. An Octagon has eight sides, right?" To which the mathematician happily replies "Yes, quite. And so?"
You then ask him, "But how many sides does a circle have?"
That should hopefully keep him away for a few hours...
Here's another. As hinted by PGK above, how do you stop a politician from pestering you? 
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A Ahad
http://www.myspace.com/aa_spaceagent |
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Abe F. March
Five Star Member
Age : 69
Joined : 26 Jan 2008
Posts : 1401
Location : Germany
| | Subject: Re: Time for a joke Fri Jul 11, 2008 4:18 am | |
| Shoot him.
_________________
"To Beirut and Back"
http://www.freewebs.com/abemarch
"With every adversity there is a benefit." |
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A Ahad
Four Star Member
Age : 40
Joined : 25 Mar 2008
Posts : 232
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zadaconnaway
Five Star Member
Age : 61
Joined : 16 Jan 2008
Posts : 2170
Location : Washington, USA
| | Subject: Re: Time for a joke Fri Jul 11, 2008 5:49 am | |
| I'm with you, Abe!! That sounds like a fitting end to me!
 line 'em up!!
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Zada Connaway
Mother's Journals: parts 1, 2 and 3 ISBN # 1-4241-6969-0
http://www.zadaconnaway.com/ |
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Shelagh
Admin
Joined : 11 Jan 2008
Posts : 2321
Location : UK
| | Subject: Re: Time for a joke Fri Jul 11, 2008 6:14 am | |
| You're a bloodthirsty lot!
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Shelagh Watkins
http://shelaghwatkins.co.uk/ |
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zadaconnaway
Five Star Member
Age : 61
Joined : 16 Jan 2008
Posts : 2170
Location : Washington, USA
| | Subject: Re: Time for a joke Fri Jul 11, 2008 6:27 am | |
| Especially in an election year!
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Zada Connaway
Mother's Journals: parts 1, 2 and 3 ISBN # 1-4241-6969-0
http://www.zadaconnaway.com/ |
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Shelagh
Admin
Joined : 11 Jan 2008
Posts : 2321
Location : UK
| | Subject: Re: Time for a joke Sun Jul 13, 2008 2:58 am | |
| Matching pairs:
Two old men were sitting on a park bench. One turned to the other and said, "You're wearing odd socks."
The man with the odd socks pulled at his trouser legs to have a close look and replied, "That's funny, I've got another pair at home just like these."
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Shelagh Watkins
http://shelaghwatkins.co.uk/ |
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